So last Saturday we had some time for solitude, just me and God. I'd like to give you a re-cap.

Me: "Ok God, please help me not be distracted from the flies or bugs and juts focus in on what You want to say to me. Where do you want me to go next semester? What do you want me to do after this trip? Lord, what is my name, what do you call me? (which is a question I've been asking lately). Lord, please speak to me in this time. I want to hear your voice. Ok I'm going to be quiet now.

God: … … …

Me: I'm listening. Speak to me Lord, please, I want to hear your voice.

God: … … …

Me: Lord, really come on. Answer me here, I'm sitting waiting for You to speak.

God:… … …

Me: I'm really getting frustrated. I'm  trying to listen to You and hear Your voice, but I can't hear you. What the heck?

God: Chelsea, I'm not a vending machine.

Me: oh.

God: I want you to come into solitude with Me and spend time with Me not to put in your fifty cents of quiet time, push a button and get what you want, but to simply spend time with Me. I want a relationship, not a Q&A. You'll get the answers that you need when you need them, by My time. For now, let's build this relationship.

I realized that I've been expecting God to speak the way I want Him to and to say and answer the things I want Him to say, which isn't how it works. I need to be listening to His voice all the time and just be ready for what He wants to say, not what I want Him to spit out.

I'm writing this Monday night not that it matters because you won't get until Friday when I post it. But yes, I wanted to share this. I'm not trying to say that it's bad to ask God questions, but we just need to make sure we're functioning on His agenda, not our own. That's something He's been showing and it can get frustrating because sometimes His agenda is simply "Wait." And that's not always fun. But waiting on His time always turns out a lot better than rushing my time. Ok dinner time we're having chicken something tonight…yes!